The 500 Hats of Mommydom

I know I am about two weeks late to celebrate Sera's nine month birthday. With every passing day, I find it so unbelievable that she is that old. She has advanced so much since my last post. She has moved up to Size 3 diapers and has transitioned from Swaddlers to Cruisers. As of Friday, she was 17 lbs and 1 oz and had grown to 28 inches. Sera still isn't teething yet, but she is using a pinching grasp to munch on fruit-flavored puffs and absolutely LOVES them. Yesterday, she even tried some egg from my morning omelette. We have yet to find food she does not like (although she likes apples and she likes pears, but did not like my homemade apples-pears).
Sera's sense of humor is growing and her laugh is infectious. She loves it when I make silly noises or when I pretend to sneeze or couch. The laughter below is from me quickly turning my head to the side:

I do have to be more careful about what I do because Sera has started to imitate. She will stick her tongue back out at me and has started to mimic the "Ah...ah...ah..." sounds before I fake sneeze. If I playfully place something on my head, she wants to put something on her head (a game that provides endless amusement). I did have to start paying more attention after I slapped myself in the head with a "D'oh!" after knocking over a container of food. Sera will occasionally place her hand to her head in a swoony fashion now.

On the rare occasions she is being difficult, I will make my "stern face," which causes her to giggle or stick out her tongue, which makes me laugh and makes her giggle. Its very difficult to stay upset with her. She has started to express frustration in new and "fun" ways, such as screaming at me and recently, by pushing me away or twisting my ear. She is also starting to test limits, especially with the dog food.

Sera's biggest accomplishment in the past month is scooting:

She mostly pulls herself forward with her hands, but is starting to push a bit more with her legs. She seems impressed by this and spent Saturday night, scooting in circles and doing laps in her room. This new skill has certainly kept us on our toes, as Sera enjoys playing with the video games (or their cases) and the dog food. She will also move whatever furniture is light enough.

Sera's favorite toys are the ring stacker, her Fisher Price remote control, and baby rain maker. One of her favorite places is our bed. The feather comforter is a soft, comfy place to roll and flop around. She enjoys songs (and will scream along), but her patience for books has unfortunately waned. She used to sit excitedly through an entire book. Now, if I sit her in my lap to read, she immediately looks up at me and smiles. She will then sit attentively for several pages, occasionally slapping the pictures. After about five or six pages, she will squirm and cry until I put the book away.

One of the very first books I ever read to her was The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins, which was  gift for her Aunt Serenity.

If you are not familiar with the story, Bartholomew removes his hat, only to find another hat underneath, and then another, and another. He eventually uncovers 500 hats, each more magnificent than the last. I have seen this story as the perfect metaphor for mommydom. I knew that mommydom would be difficult. I knew that mommydom would involve sacrifices. I did not realize that mommydom would feel so manic. Much like poor Bartholomew, just when I remove one mommy hat, there's another underneath, and then another, and another. It seems like I am constantly moving and my to-do list appears endless. While the reward of Sera in our lives is immeasurable, I can't help but wonder when I can start to read recreationally again or go to the movies or sleep more than five hours per night. How do other mommies do it? I see Facebook posts filled with outings with friends, date nights, movies, and kids-free vacations. I find myself feeling jealous because there are days when I can't do my hair because Addie has vomited on the floor and Sera is scooting in a direct path towards it. There are times when I want to take off and disappear for a bit and then feel guilty because I have so much to do and feel like I already don't get enough time with my daughter.

I have a deep respect for all mommies and find one day a year to celebrate them insufficient. Mommies spend their days in endless selfless acts, taking care of and nurturing others in one shape or form throughout the day. Which made me initially hesitant to write this this post. Because the public already labels parents as "jerks" for complaining about their kids (actually, we think that about a lot of complainers). However, adoptive and IVF moms look like greedy brats when they complain. We wanted mommydom so badly for so long and its impolite to complain about something so dearly wanted. Its like a homeless person begging for food and then complaining that you got him Wendy's instead of McDonald's. So, not only am I jealous of other mommies and the time they get to have away, I feel jealous of their right to vent and complain.

I know there will come a day when I remove that last hat and I understand that I will likely feel rudderless and lost at that time. I really should enjoy this time while it lasts, but it would be nice if we could have maybe an extra three more hours in my day and the energy to work during that time (provided it doesn't cause some kind of ecological catastrophe).